Statistics say that high school sweet hearts that get married have a 40-50% divorce rate. I have heard this stat more than once and every time someone tells me that stat I want to kick them in the shin. Friends let me tell you something...there ain't nothing wrong with marrying a high school sweetie. Now if your reading this and you just met this boy and your still in school, then don't get too excited. You probably just need to chill. So if you're going to continue reading this I've got two rules: 1. Know the man you're going to marry... I won't put a time frame on in but you need to have some time (preferably at least out of grade school) to really learn about your mate, and them know you. 2. You need to take everything you know about them and be satisfied with every part of them.
I started dating my man when I was a Junior in high school. We were both 17, young, and stupid. We made mistakes and we've learned but I wouldn't wish that we met later for an instance. We've been together now for almost 5 years and I'm thrilled to say we're getting married this July! Many people have told us garbage, that we will have a high chance of divorce, that we only feel obligated to marry because we didn't date much later in life...yada yada. It's all crap to me.
Meeting Evan at 17 was difficult because we were so young, but I love this part of us... Here are 5 reasons why...
1. You've got History
One of my favorite things about me and my sweetheart's relationship is that we have all these "remember when" moments. We can laugh about the stupid things we said when we were 17 and the silly choices we made. We can reminisce on prom, and football games, and all the sweet nostalgic memories that grade school days give you.These days are special and fun to talk about later in your relationship.
2. You did some growing up together
The fact that your both from the same generation relatively is so much fun. Evan and I laugh about the songs we were listening too back in 2009 and we can make pop culture reference that we both get and so on.This stage of your life is also when you go through a lot of changes. You're still figuring out your identity here and having someone you connect with deeply endure these changes with you is a great comfort. Then later on in your marriage you can look back and realize what a deep connection this era of your life cultivated. You two went through some of the most difficult years of your life together, and you're stronger because of it!
3. You Get to "Skip Out" on a Lot of Other Heart Breaks
Because you met your man early you got to miss a lot of the crazy, heart wrenching dating years. Many people tell me this is a disadvantage and say "my experience with different relationships is limited" and "how can i really know mine is the one if I never went out a experienced anything else". To this I say "Poo on you!". Just kidding...Truth is I am thankful because less people have taken pieces of my heart and of my self. I didn't date a lot before Evan so when I met him I had so much of my heart to offer. I didn't walk in to our relationship with as much bagged as I possibly could have. I did not have a lot of insecurities because I hadn't really had someone break my heart before so I completely trusted Evan with mine. Now going in to marriage Evan can be assured that he's been my one and only for all these years.
4. You've Seen Each Other at Your Worst
When I first met Evan I had Zero curves, I though T-shirts and jeans were fashionable, and I had the maturity of a a typical 17 year old girl. But Evan chose me, and he loved me, and he still loves me. I am so thankful he saw me for me. Evan told me recently that I have always been his "standard of beauty". So if he could love me as the awkward, gangly, girl I was then... then he will also love me when I've been up all night with the baby and smell like puke.I also went through some very difficult years in high school. Evan saw me when I was an emotional wreck, when I was childish, and when I was just down right acting a fool. He loved me then, he loves me now, and he'll love me later in life when we face equally troublesome years.
5. You've Built a Solid Foundation
If you wait until after high school, and maybe some college too, then you will have built for yourself a solid foundation for a durable marriage. This time you're investing over the years will pay off. These years give you time to sort our the difficult stuff and really learn about one another and grow together. I always say that the 2 1/2 year mark makes you or breaks you. You've got to leave the puppy love stage and get raw before you can figure out if this is the person you want to be with "till death due you part". Starting in high school gives you a head start on that!
So in saying all this, you can agree, disagree, don't give a flying flip... doesn't matter. But don't be that turd that tells a happy couple they're not going to make it just because they met young. Don't speak poison in to people's lives, speak life.
And if someone says such garbage to you and your sweetie, ignore it... you're relationship is yours not theirs and only you can decide it's success.
I did for mine, and I've never been happier!
